Sunday Church Phot-o' the Day: Church of Our Lady before Týn; Prague, Czech Republic

This is the iconic Church of Our Lady before Týn in Prague, or, if you prefer your Czech churches referenced in their Czech name, Chrám Matky Boží před Týnem. Let's stick with English.

This is the view from high atop the Old Town Hall in Old Town Prague. I believe this is the Old Town Hall because it is the Old "Town Hall," not the "Old Town" Hall, even though it is indeed in Old Town. It's on Old Town Square. Just to confuse things, I think it is "Old Town Square" because it is the "Old Town" "Square," in other words, the main square of Old Town Prague, and not the old "Town Square," with a new and improved town square nearby.

This is from my October 2011 visit to Prague.

Phot-o' the Day: Rush Hour under the Charles Bridge; Prague, Czech Republic

On the Vltava River, alongside the iconic Charles Bridge, is the place to be in Prague.

Not for me, however. I'm on the riverbank, since cruising down the river is not my thing when visiting a river city. If it's your thing: awesome. It's great that not everybody wants to do the exact same thing when visiting a city. Because it's not-so-great at all when you visit a place and everybody wants to see the exact same time. So take that cruise down the Vltava when you visit Prague. You'll enjoy. I'll pass.

From my October 2011 visit.

Sunday Church Phot-o' the Day: Infant of Prague; Church of Our Lady Victorious; Prague,Czechia

This is the Infant Of Prague, found in the Church of Our Lady Victorious (Kostel Panny Marie Vítězné) located in the Mala Strana neighborhood of the Czech capital.

On my first visit to Prague, I went to this church (just down the block from the hotel where I was staying) hoping to see the statue. When I walked in, wondering where the Infant of Prague would be, I looked up and I was shocked. Off to my right, halfway down the aisle between the doors and the altar, there he was, the Infant of Prague. Right in the open!

This is one of the most important religious icons in the world. It is definitely the most important icon in the Czech Republic and, unless I'm forgetting something obvious in Poland, it is the most important religious statue to be found in the Slavic world. And it is located in a relatively small, nondescript church in a modest neighborhood of Prague. And it is right there, in the middle of the church, for all to see. It's not locked away in a reliquary in the cathedral, paraded about once a year on an important feast day. (The Infant of Prague's feast day, for those keeping score, is January 14.)

For those who are not well-acquainted with Catholic theology, we Catholics do not pray TO the Infant of Prague. We pray AT the Infant of Prague, because, even though this is only a wax doll, this wax doll reminds us that our lord came into this world as an infant. So, yes, it would be accurate to describe the Infant of Prague icon as the world's most important wax doll.

This picture is from my second visit to Prague, in May 2018.

Phot-o' the Day: Charles Bridge and Vltava River; Prague, Czechia

A sunny afternoon along the Vltava River at the Charles Bridge in Prague, Czech Republic. You can tell it's the Charles Bridge because you can see the some of the statuary on the bridge.

And is it Czechia, or the Czech Republic? Officially, it's now Czechia, but everyone who lives there who speaks English still calls it the Czech Republic.

From the October 2011 visit to Prague.

And Then I End Up at the Hospital

The Kuks Hospital and religious statuary

Don't worry. The "Hospital" was a monastery, spa and convalescent home for soldiers in the Sudetenland built in the early 1700s. After climbing up and down all the stairs in Adrspach, I could have used some convalescing.

I got lunch instead.

No, it was not one of those famous "Las Vegas Hot Dogs" from the concession stand at the park. (From the Czech language signage, the best I could tell was that in Las Vegas, we love cole slaw on our hot dogs. Guilty!) No. It was a real Czech meal at a real Czech restaurant.

The Hotel Javor next to the park. I had the pork "sparrow" -- that's what the English language translation on the menu called it -- it was just pork cut into bite-sized bits, with potato dumpling (yes, it looks like sliced roasted potatoes, but those were very much dumplings) and some of the best sauerkraut I ever had. It was studded with cumin!

After a very filling meal, washed down in the traditional Czech way (a tall glass of Pilsner Urquell), we were whisked off to the Hospital.

The historic Kuks Hospital.

To get to the Hospital, you have to cross the mighty Elbe River.

The Elbe is one of the great rivers of Europe. This is it. We're close to the headwaters here, so the mighty Elbe is more of a creek. But it gets bigger. It eventually flows into the North Sea near Hamburg, Germany.

The "Hospital" was built by Count Anton von Sporck. He had made his fortune inventing the fork/spoon combination implement. I kid. I kid. He was a wealthy nobleman who became wealthy doing noble things.

Like building this Hospital, which was a combination monastery, spa, and convalescent home for soldiers recovering from war service. The Hospital and statuary are excellent examples of Baroque architecture.

The Hospital is best known for its Baroque statuary, the Virtues and Vices, sculpted by Matthias Braun. If you are looking up at the Hospital from the mighty Elbe, the Virtues are on the left, the Vices on the right. Each statue represents a different virtue or vice.

Here are the row of Virtues, such as generosity, or justice, or wisdom:

And here are the row of Vices, such as sloth, gluttony, vanity:

The dog in this statue looks angry, so maybe this is the Vice of Anger, or Wrath?

The pig in the statue has got to mean Gluttony:

After our heavy, filling lunch, our tour group stands here contemplating the Vice of Gluttony:

Behind the Hospital is its garden. This was well-known for its herb garden, which the monks used to make pharmaceuticals for the patients.

The communist plowed up the herb garden and planted potatoes.

But they have turned it back into an herb garden, the communists having been vanquished.

This is another statue from Matthias Braun. Recognize it? It's David, looking rather different from his Michelangelo version.

This is a view of the Czech countryside. The yellow is not sulfur lichens, as in Adrspach, but rapeseed, which we know in the USA as canola. Rapeseed is growing everywhere, by E.U. mandate, for biofuels. Yes, the communists ripped up all the land to plant potatoes. The E.U. bureaucrats ripped up all the land to plant rapeseed for biofuels.

After visiting the Hospital, we walked through the forest to here:
 

Bethlehem! Or Betlém, in Czech. This is considered to be Matthias Braun's masterpiece:

It has decayed considerably over time, due to exposure to groundwater and the atmosphere. At least the groundwater is delicious:

They keep a teacup there so you can draw a drink of the mineral water. Cool and tasty!

Near Betlém are some more sculptures.  Below is a sheep:

Contemplating the meaning of it all:

This is a statue of a murderer. Again, Braun's theme of virtue and vice. Once statue of good, another of not-so-good. Below is a rendering of a man lost in the wilderness spying a human for the first time in 60 years:

Inside his grotto:

Virtue!

Back to Prague:

My hotel is on a quiet residential street in the business section of the city.

This is not Tourist Prague, which is nice. Nearby is the beautiful Saints Cyril and Methodius Catholic Church,

Where, off to the side, a dog park is happening.

Good night from Prague.

Last Thoughts on Prague

Monday was my last day in Prague. The "blague" portion of the vacation blog will now be closing. The last sight for my visit was what appears to be an army of zombies. These aren't zombies. This is the awesome Memorial to the Victims of Communism Who Lived.

Look closely at the figures. They are slowly decaying as you move back, symbolizing the dehumanizing effect that communism had on the Czech people.

I think the context would be more apparent with the addition of another figure, a figure representing western decadence at its most gluttonous:

You knew that was coming, didn't you?

I had a great time in Prague, despite my complete inability to get over my jet lag. (E.g., I woke up this morning wide awake at 3:00 a.m. and did not go back to sleep until 6:00. Not conducive to an active schedule!) Prague is beautiful. There is endless supply of sights to see, things to do, and Czech beer to drink. Czech food is heavy, but tasty. It is also a disorienting place. It is very easy to get lost walking around here, as the streets are packed, narrow and jumbled. Because they are so narrow, you can't get any perspective. A functioning GPS on a smartphone would be wonderful here. And as I said before, Prague is lousy with tourists. That's good and bad. It tends to happen to places worth visiting. The word gets out.

The main tourist core consists solely of boatloads of tourists and the people who serve them. I have no clue where the locals go to eat, drink, get entertained. I don't even know where the business district is. This is not a town where you can mingle with the locals, not unless you venture way out from the tourist core and the guidebooks won't tell you which pubs to drink at that far from Mala Strana or Old Town.

There are four levels of places you visit. Level One are the rotten places you never want to see again. There aren't many of those on my list. Billings, Montana. Lukovdol, Croatia. That's about it. Level Two are the places you, you have a great time, but you really don't think you'll ever want to visit again. Level Three are the places you visit and you want to return to, again and again. And Level Four are those places you love so much you wish you could move there and never leave. I loved my time in Prague. I am so glad I visited here. But it might only be a Level Two on my vacation scale.

Prague After Dark

With a title like that, you think I'm going to lead you on a tour of the after-hours underbelly of Prague. No such luck. The jet lag was still affecting me, so no "Prague after dark" for me.

Walking back from the show, crossing the Charles Bridge, I saw this one bridge statute, a little off the side of the bridge, I had not seen before. I tried to take an artsy shot with the flood-lit National Theater in New Town Prague in the background:

After I crossed the bridge, I decided to hang out in a special after-hours hot spot that was jumping:

Yes. McDonald's. A couple of revelations about the Czech McDonald's. First, the McCafe:

That's a real bakery counter there! They had a selection of pastries and pies that looked awesome. I couldn't try them because of the wheat thing, but we're not talking your fried apple pie pockets here. No. A real slice of cheesecake. A real croissant. At Mickey D's! Oh, and the Big Mac or the Quarter Pounder, can't remember which, is a "Royal"! Just like in "Pulp Fiction." The ham-and-mozzarella bites also sounded particuarly awesome. And, yes, like in Germany, McDonald's does sell beer.

After that excitement, there was nothing left to do but walk the empty streets of the Little Quarter back to my hotel for some shut-eye,

Black Light Theater: Aspects of Alice

I finally got to go to the "Black Light Theater" last night. What is "Black Light Theater"? It's an only-in-Prague thing, which uses black light to camouflage the stagecraft. It also involves some puppetry, mime, etc. A lot of visitors to Prague dismiss "Black Light Theater" as "touristy." I am Mr. Self-Aware and I am fully aware that I am, in fact, a tourist. I actually like to do touristy things when I tourist. I don't like to eat in touristy restaurants. I draw the line there. But doing touristy things? Sign me up.

There are multiple "Black Light Theater" productions around town. I chose "Aspects of Alice" because (a) the source material was supposedly Lewis Carroll's Alice, and (b) the theater was conveniently located just on the other side of the Charles Bridge, in the heart of tourism row.

I would describe the production as being a community theater version of Cirque Du Soleil. The black lighting does an effective job of camouflaging the wires and such when the "Alice" character is floating and spinning -- which she seems to do for much of the production. Oh and there's a little girl-on-girl action which they call "artistic nudity." although it's more girl-on-girl toplessness as the two Alices are wearing fleshtone panties, which was weird because there were a lot of children in the audience. I guess the parents were expecting a little closer connection to Lewis Carroll's Alice, although, I must say, I didn't get the tie to either Lewis Carroll Alice book.

The music was great and, overall, it was an entertaining 80 minutes or so. It's an only-in-Prague thing, so I'm glad I went.

More Old Town Square

See those little white crosses embedded in the pavement? Those are there to commemorate 27 prominent Protestants who were beheaded on that very spot in 1621, on orders of the Catholic Habsburgs. And people just walk over them like they're part of the sidewalk.

Just one of the many little nuggets in Prague's Old Town Square, which, by the way, is most definitely lousy with tourists:

This is the monument to Jan Hus, one of the original Protestants, pre-Luther, pre-Henry VIII's divorce, martyred in 1415:

He turned his back on the papacy, yet they honor him with a hulkin' hulk of a monument. Go figure. I don't have a clue what these giant metal drums are there for:

One last view across the square:

This is my last full day in Prague. Tomorrow, I take the train to the Slovakian capital of Bratislava. It's not a major tourist destination by any means. In other words, it will not be lousy with tourists. But it will break up the train ride from Prague to Budapest, or Gyor, depending on which I choose as my point of entry from Hungary.

Prague has been a great place to visit. Lots to do here. Lots to see. Lots to eat. Yes, it's lousy with tourists (to coin a phrase), but that's because there is so much to do and see here. The churches alone could keep you busy for a week. It's crowded and disorienting and I'm leaving just about when I'm finally getting my bearings.